Thankfulness

So today's reading took to the story of Simon's mother-in-law. When I was reading I was particularly taken with the bit that said Jesus healed her and she immediately got up and began to wait on them.

I was just thinking about how good God is to provide food, clothing, shelter, financial provision and also spiritual provision and all of our physical needs. How thankful am I really? I mean I am amazingly thankful but is that reflected through my actions. How readily do I serve the Lord and His people?

Through the overflow of Simon's mother-in-law's thankfulness she immediately got up and started serving them. I want to be like...so thankful for the provision and care that He gives me that I am always drawn to serve those around me.

I have so much to be thankful for I want to wake up and immediately wait on the Lord.

Obediance

Today's post is pretty simple. It's simple yet super difficult. My reading in Gensis brought me to Noah...and I found myself examining my own obediance. Noah was amazingly obediant. It says he found favor in God's eyes and that God remembered him and what he had promised. Noah did just as God had said. He followed His instructions exactly. I know that I am definitely not that obediant. I fight God on what He asks me to do...much more then I would like to admit. It's silly becaue it's not like I think I can do better on my own cause I know from past experience that I definitely can't. I just always have to ask...why?...for how long?...what will happen next?...what do you mean wait?...the list of questions goes on and on and on...

So my prayer for this next year but especially for this season in my life is that I would be more obediant...like Noah. No questions and no hesitations...just yes Lord. I want to find favor with the Lord...like Noah. I want to see the Lords provision and rememberance in my life through the things that He has asked me to scrifice or be blindly obediant in...like Noah.

Favor

It says in Luke that God's favor was on man...I was just thinking about what that means for me. God's favor is on me...he wanted to be in relationship with me and not because He was in lack of anything or in need of something but because He wanted that for me. He wanted me to be in relationship with Him. He allows me to be in His presence and to be near Him and close to Him. He blesses me because He adores me because He chose me. He chose me to be His because of His favor on man. That's so RAD. Not only is it Rad but it makes me see the value of what I have in the Lord. Relationship, friendship, kindness, compassion, grace, love, and the list goes on and on. The amazingness of God and His graciousness to give it all to me...so RAD!!!

Creativity

God's creativity blows my mind...the fact that He saw all of this surrounded by a great expanse of nothing seriously blows my mind! The fact that He saw me from nothing is even more amazing...

Sometimes I get discouraged and wonder what it is that I'm actually good at. I mean yes I'm creative and ic an figure out how to teach myself to do stuff and make some cool things but what does that really do? I can do a bunch of stuff but is it all just stuff or is there a reason for it?

Then I read Gensis and I realize the creativity of the Lord and it gives me q confidence in who I am and what I do. I am made in the image of God and God is the most creative of them all.

Basically...I AM my Father's daughter! :) (or at least I'm tryin to be more like Him...)

It's true...kept promises

So over the past 2 years I have been attempting to teach myself to play the guitar. I love worship and writing and to be able to do both of those things along with instrumentation would be amazing. I was doing pretty good but stopped playing for a long time after my dad passed away...his guitar is now mine and the only song I actually for real know how to play, he taught me. So it was hard for awhile...recently I started taking actual lessons and as I have been practicing I am reminded by something my dad told me when I started to try to play and what my mom has reminded me of a bunch of times since then...

When my mom was pregnant with my sister, her and my dad prayed over her in my moms belly everyday that she would play the piano and sing and everyday they prayed that I would play the guitar and sing. When I told my mom I was going to start taking weekly lessons she reminded me of those daily prayers and she said "I know you can play because we prayed for it and believed it...it's a promise!"

As I think about that, I see the fulfilled promise in my sister's incredible piano playing. I am also amazed at the way the Lord reminds us of His promises through His word and through our daily lives, and I am again reminded that God is always faithful, always true, and always steadfast.

His goodness never fails to completely overwhelm me!!!

It's True...writing, writing, writing

So hi all! Sorry it's been a while since my last post. So what has been going on in the last month?

Just a warning...this is gonna be a long one. Snuggle in and be prepared... :)

This past month, I have been reminded again and again of not just Gods goodness, but His kindness. He is gentle and caring and genuinely delights in our happiness (in Him of course). I have just realized, after thinking about all the things that have gone on, the Lord has so blessed me. He has given me encouragement, hope, creativity, release, and so many other things.

I ended March with a great weekend getaway to Oregon. It was a great time to just hang out with my wonderful friend Katherine, whom I love. We drove for hours and hours and hours...about the 12th hour cabin fever set in, as we began to say all the stores and street signs we saw in different types of accents and laughing soooo hard we were crying. I'm gonna be posting some pictures (which can all be found on facebook...I think) for your viewing pleasure.

Following my return trip (alone mind you...so sad), came the day of my birth. My birthday was pretty low key and relaxed. Overall really good. I was blessed by all the happy birthday wishes and my good friends and family. I was a little worried about the day, seeing as it was the last day that my whole family (daddy included) had dinner together, since exactly one week later, he was gone. To be perfectly honest, for whatever reason, I totally didn't even realize that it was exactly a week until like a month before my birthday when I was actually looking at my calendar. I guess (April) 8 + 7 (days) = (April) 15 never really pushed its way into the smart side of my brain...so after that I spent like 3 weeks worrying about how sad it was going to be going to dinner without him, and even more then not going to dinner is not going to Shiki. Shiki is my most favorite restaurant and I have gone there on my birthday since we moved to Orange. Last year was the 14th birthday dinner we had at Shiki. I haven't been there since my birthday last year and our last family dinner. I have wanted to but the idea of having to tell Richard (our resident server and chef at Shiki) that my dad died kills me. I still don't know if he knows. So the whole idea was scary and stressful.

We ended up going to PF Changs...second favorite place! We also went to Disneyland! I love Disneyland and not only did we go to Disneyland but we went to Disneyland with Danna kids...Danna kids make everything instantly better (I'm semi-biased about the Danna kids cause I love them so much but the idea goes for any kids and babies...they make everything better). We had a great time taking the train and wandering around. All followed by a movie with my momma and 2 of the best friends ever. (AGAIN...the Lord has blessed me abundantly!!!)

Next came "the day"...the one year anniversary. This was another day that I noticed Gods amazing kindness. We were blessed by all the thoughts and love that were sent our way, they were all greatly appreciated. First of all, it was a completely amazingly beautiful day. We went to Peter's Canyon and were reminded again of the beauty that the Lord has created that is all around us. I felt a great sense of peace while I was there, just for the half hour we there. I felt like I was just resting in Him. I knew that same way I knew when I came home that day and my mom told me what happened, that no matter what I fall into His arms. I felt it when I fell down that day that He caught me and I knew at the park that He would always do that. I will ALWAYS be save, protected, loved, comforted, and gently nurtured in the arms of my Lord. It was good day! The icing on top was that I got to have my weekly Caden time at church later on too...again kids make everything better

And last but not least...the last update I have is a new project I am working on. I am working on a book. It's a kids book about loss (specifically of a parent/father)...seeing as that is what I have experienced. My dad was working on a book and that was one of the things we really had in common. We both loved to write and express ourselves that way. I was approached my a friend who asked about what my writing goals were. I said I would have to pray about it and get back to him.

So I was praying about it a couple days before the 15th and while I was praying I was reminded of something that Collette told Carol during the summer after my dad died. She looked at Carol and said, "Grandma, I bet Uncle Guy is swimming in heaven." After I remembered that, I just got to thinking that swimming forever was the greatest thing that Collie could thing of. I mean to be able to swim forever was incredible...

That birthed "Where did daddy go?" (tentative title of course)...the idea is putting daddy being there one and not the next into word pictures that kids would think, "that's the greatest thing ever." For example one of the lines includes riding a bike as fast as wants. All the things that kids wish they could do all the time put that into the concept of heaven and being with Jesus to help explain the "what happens after" someone isn't there anymore.

I am really excited about it and I'm really pleased with the words and writing that I really feel like the Lord has blessed, brought about, and really made happen. I am currently working on layout, illustrations, and publishing...so it's really exciting. If anyone knows of a good illustrator that needs some cheap work...let me know. I can draw a house like it's nobodies business but trying to draw something else...yeah not so much.

So that is what the Lord is doing and working and making happen. I promise it won't be another month til my next post...

It's True...He does the rest

God is so incredible.
I love that all we have to do is come to Him broken...and He does the rest.

I have been having trouble sleeping for just about a week now and I feel completely exhausted. It's 7:30am and I haven't been to bed yet. About an hour ago I pulled out my bible (finally...after tossing and turning for hours...) I read a few chapters, and of course, was almost instantly feeling more encouraged. As I started talking to the Lord, I just said "something just isn't right."

It seems like all it took was that simple realization. Something just isn't right and I know it's me... I believe that as soon as I did that, the Lord gave me this little ditty...which perfectly describes where I have been and what the Lord desires of me (and all of us).

This is my repentance, my prayer, and my desire...

Oh to be near You
to sit by Your side
to hear Your sweet voice
In You I abide

Though I may run
and sometimes I hide
nothing is secret
You see the inside

No matter the distance
or wrongs I have made
When darkness surrounds me
Your light will not fade

So give me the strength
to remain in this place
wrapped up in Your glory
and eternal embrace